Now, now. Don’t get ahead of yourselves. BBC Three’s new series isn’t literally 30 minutes of couples having at it on a nice settee. Sex On The Couch is indeed about sex, but the 'couch' bit refers to the sofa you're invited to sit on – and share from – at the therapist's office.
The show sees young couples visit a purpose-built clinic to get a bit of help and guidance in the bedroom. And we're not talking about the cliché "dress up", "talk dirty" and "block out some time" responses to sex problems. We've seen enough of that. Here we get deep, down and fairly dirty, unpicking the issues that are getting in the way of a really good, erm, sesh.
Between the pair in their 20s exploring their sexual fantasies for the first time, and the married couple in their early 30s who have stopped having sex altogether, Sex On The Couch offers a surprisingly revealing opportunity to eavesdrop on the inner workings of other people's sex lives (and the advice they're given to fix it, too).
Truth be told, I was most surprised by the ages of the couples who had opted for some external help. So used to the pressure of being romantically 'young', and being fed the idea that our 20s and 30s were for wild, fun and adventurous sex at all hours (lol, as if) and the action dies out as we get older, part of me expected to meet different people. Despite my better knowledge, whenever we talk about relationship counselling my mind shoots to scenes of Meryl Streep and Tommy Lee Jones in Hope Springs (a charming film for a hungover Sunday afternoon, by the way). Seeking help for that sort of thing beyond the realm of Netflix's Sex Education has often been reserved in my mind for an older generation who have touched there, banged that and come out the other end without anything more to explore sexually. But it's not. Sexual hiccups and hurdles know no bounds, and they far from have an age limit.
Courtesy of BBC
First we're introduced to 22-year-old Tanika and her 27-year-old girlfriend, Riana. They've been together for a year, Tanika has only recently come out and their expectations of what a relationship should look like – sexually and emotionally – seem to differ. Tanika has a higher sex drive, Riana has a habit of actively avoiding sex and so they've fallen into a rut. They're given three sessions with one of the four sexual therapists on the show to try and work out where things are going wrong, with homework assignments to complete between meetings. The good news is that they manage to have a conversation about their sexual fantasies for the first time (which align better than either of them expected); the bad news is that the whole therapy process doesn't sit quite so well with one of them.
Next up we meet Louisa (30) and Nick (34), who have been together for five years. Things changed dramatically when they moved in together and enjoyable sex has gone out of the window. Over the course of their therapy session we learn that deep-rooted friction in their relationship overrides the reasons Louisa and Nick assumed they weren't having sex. Their homework assignment is to try massage as a gentle way to create intimacy and a whole new revelation comes to light when their attempt to move forward is halted.
Eavesdropping on other people's conversations/relationships/sex lives is interesting all on its own of course, but this six-part series zooms in just a little bit further. Whether you like it or not, it will likely make you take stock of how your thought processes or behaviours might be preventing the sex of your dreams. Format-wise, it's not far from Celebs Go Dating – the couples enter the sleek and modern clinic, are greeted by a glamorous receptionist and ushered in for their private sessions with a therapist. But here we get to watch people reveal their most intimate secrets and understand their desires, all while on the brink of a relationship breakdown. Intense, right? You'll be surprised – it might just tell us a bit more about how fragile our generation's attitudes to sex really are.
Sex On The Couch is on BBC Three iPlayer from 26th April and will air on BBC One at 11.25pm that evening
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If you're a woman who wants to have kids someday (but not right now), you'll more than likely have a growing distaste for the word 'fertility'. The older you get, the more it starts popping up everywhere, from targeted Google ads to your mum's friend Karen. Hit your late 20s, and the subject of just how equipped and ready your womb is to carry a child becomes a matter of public discussion – whether you like it or not.
The trouble is that all the information out there regarding fertility is so confusing. Karen's regurgitating the same fertility advice she heard from doctors back in 1978 and now, the internet: a web of communication that was meant to give us the power of knowledge but has allowed half truths and rumours about our health to flourish.
A recent study by the Royal College of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists found confusing fertility advice is "sparking unnecessary worry among UK women" with 86% saying that they find all the information from different sources contradictory. Forty-nine percent have worried about their own fertility and a quarter of 18-24-year-olds are concerned. In fact, two in five younger women have considered freezing their eggs in the future.
So if you're not quite at the point where you want to have kids, should you be worrying about your fertility now? Or are you free to think about something else?
Ahead, we rounded up some of the unsolicited things young women at Refinery29 and beyond have been told about their fertility and which have bothered them over the years. To put their minds at rest, we asked the experts just how much of what they'd heard was true, and how much of it could be taken with a pinch of salt.
Click through to find out.
Really? Do you mean like, now?
Let's break it down...
"The benefits of freezing your eggs at a young age – ideally by the time you're 36 – is that the eggs are still of good enough quality and that their number is adequate enough to provide the best chance possible of having a child later in life if a woman struggles to fall pregnant naturally," explains Dr Larisa Corda, a fertility consultant who obtained her MRCOG in 2015 and is an ambassador for fertility tracker myLotus - which lets women track their fertility levels at home.
At the same time, she says doing it too young could mean going through an unnecessary procedure – one which involves not only money but also medical risks. "The truth is that every woman and every set of circumstances is different. I would advise that if you are considering egg freezing, go and see a specialist and discuss. Rather than jumping straight to this procedure, consider getting a fertility MOT done first to find out more about your fertile health."
A fertility MOT, she says, will check the number of follicles in your ovaries and also your AMH, "a hormone made by the ovaries that reflects the number of eggs which are there." This, she says, "can provide a fairly reliable indication of how fast your own personal biological clock is ticking and help guide any decision-making about how and when to have children."
A thrilling 'compliment' from a well-meaning older relative which, according to Dr Corda, is very unhelpful. "This is a pretty outdated term and one that isn't at all appropriate anymore in our society!"
Emma Cronin, registered midwife and nurse advisor within the AXA PPP healthcare Health at Hand team agrees. "[Hip size] does not have any bearing on the ability of a woman to deliver a baby vaginally," she says. "The shape of a woman’s hips varies between ethnic groups and it is whether the baby is lying in the correct position and the body labouring efficiently at the time of labour that often is the indicator as to whether a woman can deliver the baby vaginally."
Dr Corda elaborates: "During the pregnancy itself, the cartilage between the pelvic bones will loosen to accommodate the growing baby and also, the baby's skull bones will mould over each other as the baby descends in the birth canal to be able to negotiate the passage."
There are four different general shapes to the pelvis, she explains, with the most common allowing easier accommodation of a baby. "During the process of labour, your obstetrician or midwife will check the position of the baby, how well the head is engaged, how well you're contracting, descent, dilation of the cervix, and so on." Those factors, she emphasises, will help the medical team decide how best to deliver the baby, not the size of your hips.
"Remember," she says, "most women are perfectly designed to grow and deliver a baby that is the right size for them, no matter what the shape of their pelvis."
An 'encouraging' statement one R29er was given as a reason to tell their partner they wanted kids sooner. But is it true? "Fertility ability does reduce with age," admits Emma. Ironically however, waiting until later could actually lead to you having more children as older women are more likely to use fertility treatments. "Older women are more likely to have multiple births. Fertility treatments where multiple fertilised eggs are used, where there is a family history of having multiple births, where women release two eggs in a cycle period or where a fertilised egg splits into two during the developmental stage can increase the likelihood of having twins."
"It's impossible to be categorical about this," says Dr Corda. "Some women continue to conceive naturally into their late 30s and early 40s. There's no guarantee at any age that you'll necessarily have the exact number of children you want." However she does say that some planning ahead could be useful to help give you the best possible chance. "Consider some fertility preservation options if you don't want to start too young but want to give yourself the best chance later. It's always best to discuss this with a specialist who can advise on your particular set of circumstances and clinical picture."
Said by Sex and the City, your yoga teacher, your mate's mate... But can acupuncture actually be helpful?
In fact, acupuncture is looking promising. "Research has been taking place and it has found that acupuncture can help improve fertility by increasing the blood flow to the sexual organs as well as help reduce stress levels and balance the endocrine hormones," says Emma.
Dr Corda is similarly enthusiastic. "More and more studies are demonstrating its benefits and improvement in conception rates. Of course, we cannot prove this as there are too many variable or confounding factors involved when studying, but acupuncture has been shown to improve blood flow to the pelvic organs, such as your womb and ovaries, and also induce a state of calm, lowering your stress and cortisol levels, all of which can be beneficial to fertility."
A classic 'helpful' and oft repeated line from your mum which really puts a downer on Sunday lunch. And as Dr Corda and Emma both tell us, it's not always the case.
"As you get older, the quality of both the eggs and sperm deteriorate in their condition and this can make conceiving more difficult, but the body tends to have a natural selection process where fertilised eggs are usually naturally discarded or miscarried if they are not developing properly," explains Emma. There are many factors other than age – like genetics – that can complicate pregnancy.
Dr Corda explains that the risk comes from the fact that the older you are when you have your children, the more chance there is of you having a co-existing medical condition that could cause problems in pregnancy – like thyroid problems or high blood pressure. She goes on to say that unfortunately a higher age naturally places you at more obstetric risk for things such as preeclampsia and diabetes. "Having said that though, every woman is different," she reassures us. "While it's important to counsel about these risks, there are lots of women in their late 30s and 40s who don't have any problems in their pregnancies, because they are fit and healthy to start off with. Investing in your health from an earlier age and continuing to do so will help enormously when it comes to this."
Heard: everywhere. Surely there's a less loaded way to define women who have babies in their 30s?
"I personally would never use this term." says Dr Corda. "It was used for women over the age of 35, which is roughly when the steeper drop in fertility rates occurs, but current figures and research shows that the fastest growing group of women having children are those in their 40s."
She continues: "There has been a big demographic shift we're seeing now, compared to even a decade ago, and the number of women having children in their late 30s and 40s will continue to rise, because of how much women's lives have changed and because they now have many more options. Therefore, to call a woman geriatric after the age of 35 is insulting not just to her but to our society."
It is, however, likely that if you do get pregnant over 35, regardless of whether you've had children or not, you will be considered for increased scans or monitoring to see if you have any health concerns or complications, says Emma.
Heard here and there over the years, it's something that one PCOS-suffering R29er tries not to let niggle away at her anxiety as she gets older.
"This is a complete myth and not true!" says Dr Corda. "There are many women with polycystic ovaries out there – in fact, up to one in five women could be affected – and many go on to get pregnant naturally."
There are, of course, potential conception issues that can arise from having PCOS. "It tends to mean that a woman has immature egg cells that are often filled with fluid," explains Emma. "It also results in an increased level of testosterone which can lead to delays in the egg maturing and being released, as well as causing irregular menstrual cycles."
The healthier one is when it comes to conceiving, Dr Corda says, the better. "Exercise, diet and stress relief are crucial as they all help to reduce the overall level of inflammation associated with this condition, as well as improve blood sugar regulation."
Our takeaway from the whole thing? If you're worried about your fertility, there's no harm in scheduling a fertility MOT so you know exactly where you stand. From there, you can make educated plans that suits you - because it's your body, and nobody else's.
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If you thought the movie Tusk was the most disturbing content to feature a walrus, then you clearly have not watched Netflix's Our Planet yet. The nature documentary series features a brutal scene of walruses falling to their deaths off a cliff, and it's shaking people to their very core.
In the second episode of the Netflix series, "Frozen Worlds," producer and director of the episode Sophie Lanfear watches as a group of walruses scale a tall, steep cliff in order to find a place to rest after feasting. According to Lanfear, the walruses used to rest on ice in the middle of the ocean, but now that the ice has melted due to climate change, the animals have to swim many miles to this rocky shore for some reprieve.
Due to overcrowding on the rocky shore, the walruses are forced to climb high onto the rocks for room. Many get disoriented and plummet to their deaths.
"You’re rooting for them not to go over the edge and for them to go back down the way they came, and a few small groups did go back the way they came, and you are just celebrating," Lanfear told People of the harrowing scene. "Sadly, the majority of the ones on the cliffs did not work that out."
Viewers watching at home had a lot of feelings about this.
"Literally full on sobbed to the walrus moment. This whole docu series is so heartbreaking. #OurPlanet," wrote one fan. "I wish as humans we can do more."
Literally full on sobbed to the walrus moment. This whole docu series is so heart breaking. #OurPlanet I wish as humans we can do more.
Netflix has heard fan cries and recently put out a graphic content warning. The official Netflix Family Twitter account shared time stamps for people wanting to avoid the walrus death, as well as any other disturbing images.
PSA for parents watching Our Planet, here are some sad moments (the walrus 😭) you *may* want to skip:
While the woefully tragic scene has definitely messed people up, some people argue that the reason given in the documentary series for why the walruses are up on the cliff is inaccurate. Canadian zoologist Dr. Susan Crockford claimed it was actually a polar bear attack that encouraged the walruses to fall. (No polar bear is seen in the docu-series.) However, per TMZ, Netflix insists that the fact that less ice is available for the walruses to rest is what put them in dangerous territory.
As sad as this segment of Our Planet is, it may be the emotional kick to remind us that we need to treat the earth better.
Our Planet is available to stream on Netflix now
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“You went to bed grown, and you woke up little? That’s for white people, ‘cause black people don’t have the time.”
Those words, delivered with gleeful panache by Issa Rae in Little, sum up exactly what makes this movie different from the many beloved iterations of the body switch trope: the protagonists are not white. In most other respects, Little fits in right alongside the likes of 13 Going On 30, Big, 17 Again, and Freaky Friday. And that’s part of the appeal. Following in the footsteps of recent successes like Crazy Rich Asians, To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before, and Black Panther, Little upgrades a classic genre by placing people of colour in a familiar narrative. It’s groundbreaking because we’ve seen it so many times before — just not quite like this.
The film opens in 1993, when a young Jordan Sanders (Marsai Martin) takes the stage at the Windsor Middle School talent show, hoping to break through into the popular clique. Bullied by her peers, she instead lands in the hospital, vowing that when grown up, she’ll never let anyone take advantage of her again. Fast-forward to the present, and now-38-year-old Jordan (Regina Hall) is the high-powered CEO of a tech company in Atlanta. She’s got it all: hot artist boyfriend (Luke James), penthouse apartment with floor-to-ceiling windows and city views, a closet that even Kylie Jenner would envy. She’s also a borderline sociopath, a bully hated by her staff, her neighbours, and most of all, her assistant, April (Issa Rae). But when an encounter with a budding black girl magician turns her 13 again, she must come to terms with herself in a way she never has before.
Marsai Martin, who famously pitched the concept for the film when she was 10 years old and has an executive producing credit, crackles as Little Jordan. Forced to return to middle school, the scene of her formative trauma, she toggles between the breathless apprehension of any kid who doesn’t quite fit in, and the swishy confidence of a woman who has the world at her feet. Her chemistry with Rae, whose hilarious April must pose as Jordan’s guardian for the duration of the spell, is electric. Hall, meanwhile, goes full Cruella De Ville as grown-up Jordan. Her actions sometimes go beyond those of a mean boss: This woman would skin puppies.
But it’s the little things (pun very much intended) that make Little feel truly unique. Director Tina Brown told Refinery29 earlier this year that she was committed to having black female creators represented throughout the film, and those details shine through, from the art displayed throughout Jordan’s apartment and company, to an Alexa-like “Homegirl” prototype voiced by Tracee Ellis Ross. Even the wine sipped by April and Jordan comes from black female-owned wineries.
Fashion is integral to the body switch genre — think back to Jenna’s first encounter with 30-year-old her’s closet in 13 Going On 30. And here too, Little innovates. Costume designer Danielle Hollowell emphasised black designers like Virgil Abloh, Carly Cushnie, and Brother Vellies’ Aurora James, giving Adult Jordan, Little Jordan and April their own, very specific styles. (That pink pantsuit! That gold skirt! The many colour-blocked heels! Gimme all of it!)
The script by Gordon and Tracy Oliver is a little more uneven, A couple of jokes— one at the expense of a plus-size woman, the other suggesting a little girl looks like she’s transitioning — don’t quite land. Little doesn’t need to go low — it has far better material to work with. Overall, the film transcends when it taps into its own power of representation. One scene, in which Little Jordan and April embark on an impromptu karaoke rendition of Mary J. Blige’s “I’m Going Down” in a fancy restaurant filled with mostly white patrons, is particularly effective. Meanwhile, the impact of seeing a company employing many people of colour in high-power positions — rather than in solitary, token diversity roles — is a refreshing step forward.
But though Little thrives on specificity, its themes are universal. Being a teenager isn’t easy. And though most of the scenes are played for laughs, the movie never downplays the plight of those who are marginalised by others for looking, sounding or feeling different. Martin’s fellow middle-school misfit co-stars, Tucker Meek, JD McCrary, and Thalia Tran, are heart-achingly earnest, in the best possible sense, which will prompt even the iciest adult to care about their plight. (And yes, This Is Us ’ Justin Hartley does make an appearance as a hot teacher, although he doesn’t get nearly as much screen time as you’d think judging from the film’s promos.)
All in all, Little is a welcome addition to the canon. And if someone has a tip on where to find a matching pink pantsuit, my inbox is open.
“Little” celebrates black women, from the actors onscreen to the team behind the camera to the costume design. Support the film, which comes out 12th April, with the hashtag #Ladies4Little.
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Alexander Wang has long played by his own rules. Drawing inspiration from his gang of New York cool kids, his shows are always buzzing with the energy of the city, whether it's in the form of a robot as the star of his FROW (Sophia was snapped front row in Wang's boxy blazer at his AW19 show) or having models stomp down his catwalks in pigtails and biker boots. Even in times of turbulence he's marching to the beat of his own drum: he's dropped out of the New York Fashion Week schedule to show in June and December instead.
Whatever he turns his hand to has that current of electricity running through it, and now, he's keeping us cool on hot days in the city. Collaborating with Uniqlo on a collection using the Japanese retailer's AIRism technology, Wang is bringing his signature effortlessness to our summer wardrobes, too.
"We first collaborated with Uniqlo in 2008 for a capsule collection and I’ve stayed in touch with Mr Yanai, ever since — he’s always been supportive of the brand and told me to reconnect when I had another idea," said Wang in a statement. "The idea of mixing innerwear and the technology of the Uniqlo fabric felt like the perfect opportunity to jumpstart a new collaboration. Beyond the technology of AIRism, our collection is centred around wearing functional pieces that keep you cool on hot summer days while also feeling and looking great."
The collection sees loose-fitting tees, low-back bodies and scoop-neck crop tops in pastel hues like mint, sky blue and peach. Sports-ready cycling shorts, camisole vests and leggings mean that, come June, there's no need to ditch that spin class (in favour of an after-work Aperol), plus bras and pants mean you'll be as comfy as possible on even the hottest of holidays.
The collection follows Wang's previous partnership with Uniqlo, which focused on the brand's Heattech fabric and kept us snug all winter long. So how should we style the collection? "My favourite pieces are the bike shorts and crop top, and I'll be mixing the items with everyday things like jeans." Just add a cross-body belt bag and some chunky trainers and you've got your festival look sorted.
Alexander Wang has our summer basics covered, giving us everything we need to keep cool on those sweltering summer days.
What darkness lies in the heart of man? That quote gets really literal in Netflix's upcoming series Chambers, and trust: This show will Mess. You. Up.
The new series — which stars Uma Thurman and Scandal 's Tony Goldwyn — is about teenager Sasha (Sivan Alyra Rose) who receives a heart transplant after a surprise heart attack. Though the new organ saved her life, things start to get weird when Sasha begins to experience strange visions and memories that don't belong to her.
It's more than just visions: The new trailer suggests that Sasha's new heart may be affecting her personality as well. Why else would she so callously slice the tail off a mouse, with the very same knife she's using to cut up hot dogs?
To further complicate matters, the parents of donor Becky (Lilliya Reid) may be involved in some weird culty shit — which Sasha can't avoid once they gift her a scholarship to a fancy, new age-y high school.
"It's just so weird that someone had to die for me to live," says Sasha in the new trailer, which is the understatement of the century. Once Becky, with Billie Eilish-like black liquid oozing from her mouth, appears in the middle of a gymnasium, you know this show is not playing around.
Like a supernatural version of 13 Reasons Why or The OA, Chambers is, according to a statement from creator Leah Rachel, all about how we "metabolize trauma." However, Rachel warns that the show devolves into something "more effed up than you were expecting."
Watch with the lights on.
Check out the trailer for Chambers below:
Chambers hits Netflix April 26.
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Just as sonic cleansing brushes hit the shelves about a decade ago, so came the hotly-debated question among skincare professionals as to whether they were worth investing in. Some, like facialist Joanna Vargas, have argued that a cleansing brush is just the thing we need to keep pores gunk-free and really release all that sunscreen and makeup buildup from our faces. Others, like aesthetician Caroline Hirons , maintain that the use of cleansing brushes is likely to lead to over-cleansing, and inflammation and broken capillaries in the process.
But time has produced a wealth of options and improvements on original devices, with plush brushes, silicone surfaces, and more affordable versions entering the fold. What's more, today's cleansing devices do much more than just clean your face: They create custom cleansing settings, analyse your skin's progress over time, and set phone reminders for when to cleanse and replace brush heads.
Ahead, we tried four different options at a range of price points. The one thing they have in common? They're all ultra-gentle on the skin, something that may just settle the age-old "to brush or not to brush?" argument once and for all.
Refinery29's selection is purely editorial and independently chosen – we only feature items we love! As part of our business model we do work with affiliates; if you directly purchase something from a link on this article, we may earn a small amount of commission. Transparency is important to us at Refinery29, if you have any questionsplease reach out to us.
A new Clarisonic might sound like an unnecessary indulgence — after all, they can last for years and still work just fine — but the newer models boast all kinds of new features, thanks to a connected app that (along with a few selfies) helps track skin-care goals and sends alerts when it's time to cleanse every day and replace the brush head. (If you really want to get fancy, the Smart Mia can also offer lymphatic drainage, skin contouring, and smooth makeup application via different brush heads — but we're here for the cleansing.) While data and push notifications are definite perks, they don't distract from the wand's mission to leave skin feeling deeply clean while not roughing it up in the process. The bundled brush head is plenty soft, the device has gentle and customised settings to ensure the vibration isn't too aggressive for your skin type, and its oscillating brush head means no tugging at the skin.
Clarisonic Clarisonic Mia Smart, $148, available at Current Body
The rotating brush head is hard to control and seemed to steer itself into tugging at the skin, which means this baby can be feisty. That said, the brush head's charcoal fibres are ultra soft and the wand itself is extremely ergonomic. It's also nice that it can stand on its own without a cradle, but it would be that much cooler if it came with a cover for the exposed brush head.
Proactiv Charcoal Cleansing Brush, $34.99, available at Proactiv
Cuteness aside, the "eyes" on this device actually work as skin sensors, used to read moisture levels on the cheeks, nose, and forehead before first use. The device takes that data and sets cleansing times for those parts of the face, and gives you skin intel on the brand's app that you probably don't want to know (like its assessment of how your skin's age stacks against your actual age). But actually cleansing with this tool is simple — even if you have your doubts about how much a textured silicone slab the size of a hockey puck could deep clean, skin feels surprisingly fresh after. The rounded edge makes it easy to get into the corners of your nose where oil and dirt collect, and the size and reusable case make it easy to tote along to the gym.
This device exfoliates the surface of the skin, chipping away at dulling cells and remnants of makeup, and turfs gunk from pores to uncover brighter clearer skin in 60 seconds. It's pretty powerful, so we'd recommend holding it up to the skin gently and enlisting it just once or twice a week to help along your evening water-based cleanse.
Magnitone BareFaced Vibra-Sonic™ Daily Cleansing Brush, $70, available at LookFantastic
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Update (2pm on 11th April): Sudan's military says it has overthrown the country's president, Omar al-Bashir, who has been arrested after 30 years in power. Defence minister Awad Ibn Ouf told state TV that the country had been through a period of "poor management, corruption, and an absence of justice", and that a three-month state of emergency has now been put in place the BBC reports.
This story was originally published at midday on 11th April.
An image of a young Sudanese woman protesting in the country's capital, Khartoum, began to go viral this week, bringing the world's attention to the volatile political situation in the northeast African country.
Protests against Sudan's president, Omar al-Bashir, began in December and intensified at the weekend, with the country's army announcing on Thursday that it would be making an "important announcement", which some reporters have suggested could mean they're set to oust him after three decades in power.
The striking photo of 22-year-old architecture student Alaa Salah (seen above), pictured on Monday standing above the crowd atop a car, pointing to the sky and dressed in white, has become a symbol of hope for many women and girls in Sudan, a country known for state repression of women's rights.
The arresting image was taken by Twitter user Lana Haroun and had been retweeted more than 18k times and garnered over 62k likes by Thursday morning.
Don’t know her name, but this Woman in #Sudan is leading rallies, standing on car roofs, and pleading for change against autocratic Bashir.
Video clips on social media, captured in front of the heavily guarded military and intelligence services' HQ, show Salah leading chants of "revolution" to motivate the crowd. "[Salah] was trying to give everyone hope and positive energy and she did it," Haroun told the Guardian. "She was representing all Sudanese women and girls and she inspired every woman and girl at the sit-in. She was telling the story of Sudanese women ... she was perfect."
Haroun knew she had captured the zeitgeist when she saw the image on her phone, she continued: "I immediately thought: this is my revolution and we are the future."
What's motivating the protestors?
The first wave of non-violent protests against President Bashir began four months ago, on 19th December, after the government trebled the price of bread. The discord has escalated and spread in recent weeks, with Salah and an increasing number of other female activists urging the president, who took power in a coup in June 1989, to stand down. Despite the almost entirely peaceful nature of the demonstrations, between 45 and 60 people have been killed by the government and hundreds arrested, some of them tortured, the BBC reports.
What role have women played in the movement?
Young women have been instrumental in calling for the president's resignation, often comprising the majority of the crowds, and as a result around 150 female activists were detained following the initial wave of protests in December. According to the international NGO Human Rights Watch, national security services make particular efforts to target women during crackdowns. They are frequently arrested by the country's "public order police" for their clothing choices or exposing their hair, and subjected to flogging, stoning and other corporal punishment for "morality crimes", including adultery. Under Bashir in 2016, some 15,000 women were reportedly sentenced to flogging.
"For many women this regime is synonymous with all types of repression," said Jehanne Henry, from Human Rights Watch. "It is not surprising that they are seeing this as an opportunity to change things that matters to them."
What does Salah make of her sudden fame?
For a start, she's happy about the global attention the picture has brought to the chaos in her country. "I’m very glad that my photo let people around the world know about the revolution in Sudan … Since the beginning of the uprising I have been going out every day and participating in the demonstrations because my parents raised me to love our home," Salah told the Guardian on Wednesday, adding that she is not motivated by politics or sectarian divisions, but by a love for Sudan.
"The day they took the photo, I went to 10 different gatherings and read a revolutionary poem. It makes people very enthusiastic. In the beginning I found a group of about six women and I started singing, and they started singing with me, then the gathering became really big." Salah's apparent ease with public speaking is a result of a lot of practising while at university, but that didn't stop her from getting a sore throat from all the chanting, she added.
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We are delighted to report that Michelle Obama's spectacle of fashion-forward outfits has continued onto the Scandinavian leg of her Becoming book tour. Our former first lady continues to show us how liberated she feels post-White House, wearing glamorous designers like Pyer Moss, Cushnie, Balenciaga, and Givenchy. But the thing we love about our previous FLOTUS is that she makes an effort to champion designers of different races and cultures — something the current FLOTUS doesn't seem to value.
During Obama's Copenhagen stop earlier this week, she wore a Danish designer, spotlighting the local fashion scene. She donned a Millennial-pink suit embellished with crystals on both the jacket and the pants by Copenhagen-based designer Stine Goya. And she added a little more sparkle courtesy of a pair of Vhernier ‘Pop’ Diamond Earrings.
Stine Goya shared a photo of Michelle Obama in the suit to Instagram, sharing a caption from the brand's namesake and creative director. "For us, @michelleobama represents everything we strive to represent through our collections – strength, intelligence, independence, confidence – Mrs Obama possesses a vivacity and spirit like no other!" the caption reads. "Her role as an activist, mother, writer shows the multiplicity of the female spirit - we are so honored to have been considered to work with her for the European/Scandinavian tour."
On another photo of Michelle on Instagram, a full-body look at the suit, Stine Goya writes "We're beyond proud to have designed this custom made & hand embellished suit to the one and only @michelleobama."
The colour of Obama's suit was created just for her but a version of the outfit is currently on-sale at Net-A-Porter for £820.
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H&M is one of the few mass retailers embracing the sustainable fashion movement, one kickass collection at a time. Since 2010, the Swedish brand's released a total of eight Conscious collections, with each year bringing forth a set of new initiatives. Despite still trying to wrap our heads around last year's mind-blowing creativity (clothing made of fishnets?), one glance at H&M's newest release and we can honestly say that it's so. much. better.
This morning, H&M launched their most sustainable Conscious collection yet. The 48-piece line is made from super innovative plant-based fabrics, from a silver jacket made from Piñatex (a.k.a. pineapple leather) to an off-shoulder blouse fashioned from orange peels.
"We’re thrilled to introduce new plant-based sustainable materials to create high-performing, beautiful and fashionable pieces that are statement-making yet so easy to wear,” H&M Creative Advisor, Ann-Sofie Johansson said in a press release. But their commitment to sustainability doesn't stop at this one collection. According to Isak Roth, the brand's Global Sustainability Manager, H&M is using this range as a starting point for their long-term goal of using "only 100% recycled or other sustainably-sourced materials by 2030."
To celebrate this game-changing collection, H&M gathered a host of celebrities, influencers and press at a rustic locale in Laurel Canyon, Los Angeles. Amongst the golden hour sunsets and sound bath performances were the likes of Alex Wek, Halima Aden, Dakota Fanning and Amber Valetta — all donning pieces from the aforementioned line.
Ahead, check out our favourite pieces from the new collection — available on HM.com now — and feel good knowing that for once, your purchase isn't totally screwing us over.
At Refinery29, we’re here to help you navigate this overwhelming world of stuff. All of our market picks are independently selected and curated by the editorial team. If you buy something we link to on our site, Refinery29 may earn commission.
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The photo of 29-year-old computer scientist Dr. Katie Bouman is familiar to many by now: She's sitting at her computer with her hands over her mouth, having just created the first image of a black hole ever.
"Watching in disbelief as the first image I ever made of a black hole was in the process of being reconstructed," Dr. Bouman wrote in the caption to her Facebook post.
Dr. Bouman led the development of a computer algorithm that made this game-changing image possible. The photo shows a ring of dust and gas surrounding the shadow of a mass at the centre of the Messier 87 (M87) galaxy.
The picture and her name quickly went viral, and everyone from celebrities to politicians heaped much-deserved praise on the young woman's accomplishment.
Even Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez took a few seconds off from serving up realness on the House floor and building her own Ikea furniture, and tweeted, "Take your rightful seat in history, Dr. Bouman! Congratulations and thank you for your enormous contribution to the advancements of science and mankind. Here's to #WomenInSTEM!"
Take your rightful seat in history, Dr. Bouman! 🔭
Congratulations and thank you for your enormous contribution to the advancements of science and mankind.
Senator and presidential candidate Kamala Harris showed her support as well, writing, "Katie Bouman proved women in STEM don't just make the impossible, possible, but make history while doing it."
Katie Bouman proved women in STEM don't just make the impossible, possible, but make history while doing it.https://t.co/NhcqBngY8K
On the other side of the aisle, first daughter and White House advisor Ivanka Trump, who has done work to support women in STEM, tweeted, "Big congrats! Hooray for #WomenInSTEM like Bouman!"
Today, the world saw the 1st-ever image of a #BlackHole - an amazing accomplishment made possible by Scientist Katie Bouman.
Dr. Bouman started creating the algorithm three years ago while she was a graduate student at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT). She led the project with the help of a team of scientists from MIT's Computer Science and Artificial Intelligence Laboratory, the Harvard-Smithsonian Center for Astrophysics, and the MIT Haystack Observatory.
The black hole image was captured by the Event Horizon Telescope (EHT), a network of eight linked telescopes, and rendered by Dr. Bouman's algorithm. It was captured with the help of telescopes in locations around the world.
"This is...the beginning of being able to have another window into what black holes can tell us about our laws and physics," Dr. Bouman said on her Instagram. "Already, we've learned so much. We didn't know...we were going to get that ring of light. And that's what we were testing. We could have gotten just a blob. And so, seeing that ring, and seeing a ring that has a size that is consistent with other measurements that have been done completely differently, I think that in itself, just being able to see that that ring exists, is huge."
Dr. Bouman is currently a post-doctoral fellow at MIT, but will soon start as an assistant professor of computing and mathematical sciences at the California Institute of Technology. Her advice for the next generation of women in STEM? "As long as you're excited and you're motivated to work on it, then you should never feel like you can't do it," she told TIME.
Wine Country stars Rachel Dratch as Rebecca, who gets away with a group of friends (played by Poehler, Rudolph, Ana Gasteyer, Paula Pell, and Emily Spivey) in honour of her 50th birthday. Poehler's Abby has put together a full Napa vacation in honour of old times and in hopes of bringing the spark back to their long-running, long-neglected friendships. However, this reunion has notes of drama as the women realise their lives and their relationships may not be everything they had hoped.
"Celebrating with a girls weekend, huh?" Fey asks in the trailer. "Just remember, guys, whatever gets said is probably what the person has always felt and the alcohol just let it out."
As Abby watches her meticulously-planned weekend fall apart and Rebecca grapples with ageing, the women begin to wonder if their decades of friendship were worth it.
"These women I have known for twenty-plus years, and yeah, sometimes I want to tell this one to fuck off," Poehler says. "That's what intimacy is."
Wine Country comes swirling to Netflix on May 10. Watch the trailer below.
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Right now in popular culture, we're fascinated by women who seem to have gotten away with something. Whether it's Elizabeth Holmes fooling investors and the media, Anna Delvey claiming to be a German heiress, or Lori Loughlin's alleged college admissions scam, we can't stop looking at these women — and more specifically, what they are wearing.
Last Wednesday, Loughlin was photographed on her way to a court appearance in Boston. The actress, famous for her role on Full House as Aunt Becky and a slew of Hallmark Channel films, took the opportunity to sign autographs for fans outside the court house. She wore a light brown statement suit with a ribbed grey shirt and a pair of leather round-toe boots, topped with a pair of smart-looking eyeglasses.
Loughlin isn't the only famous woman championing a certain aesthetic for their court appearances. Early last week, alleged scammer Anna Sorokin (née Anna Delvey) was to appear in front of the New York Supreme Court but was a no-show — because she didn't have the right outfit. According to The Daily Beast, Sorokin is working with former Glamour magazine editor Anastasia Walker to pull together looks for her courtroom appearances. Because Sorokin's outfit had not been delivered to Rikers Island Prison, Delvey refused to come before the judge wearing the court-issued black pants and white shirt. “Either the clothes go to Rikers, or she shows up here in black and white,” Judge Kiesel said. “This is the last day we’re playing with clothes.”
Photo: TIMOTHY A. CLARY/AFP/Getty Images.
The courtroom outfit has long been a subject of fascination. Historically, defendants and plaintiffs alike wear muted, pared-down pieces of clothing to appear solemn in front of the judge and jury. Few courtroom looks have garnered the type of media attention that Lori and Anna now enjoy, except for Naomi Campbell's Azzedine Alaïa dress and Lindsay Lohan's manicure that was a literal Eff You to the judge. What does it say about our culture, and these women, that the courtroom outfit has become akin to a red carpet moment?
With the swarm of photographers, endless news coverage, and celebrity status afforded to defendants like Anna Delvey, it's not surprising that people are treating court appearances like red carpet moments. It's a way for celebrities to act as their own historians, turning every public moment into a photo opp, a headline, a chapter in their memoir, or a visual flashcard about their narrative which they want to control.
By diverting attention to their clothing, they're shifting the focus away from their (alleged) crimes and onto their exterior selves, their taste, and their access to money and luxury. Anna Delvey's fixation on what she wears — and her refusal to show up to court because of her outfit — is blatantly disrespectful to our legal system. And perhaps if Loughlin had spent more time reading her plea deals and less on what she was wearing, she wouldn't be facing more prison time.
Already, courtroom looks are inspiring press releases and trend recaps. The question is ... how far will it go? Once people start using court appearances to promote their fashion lines, for example, we'll really be in trouble.
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First she came for makeup. Then she came for lingerie. And now, it looks like Rihanna is coming for skin care.
According to the United States Patent and Trademark Office database, the trademark "Fenty Skin " was officially filed with the federal agency on March 25th, 2019. The filing covers skin care, body care, personal care products, and accessories like kits and tools — and, in our opinion, they can't come soon enough.
This isn't the first time that rumours have swirled about a Rihanna skin-care line. In 2017, one Twitter user spotted a skin-care filing under "House of Fenty" (which is still live), but nothing ever came of the buzz. But with the explosive growth of Fenty Beauty and Savage x Fenty lingerie, now seems like the perfect time to branch into the global skin-care category — which is projected to grow from £103 billion this year to over £135 billion by 2024, according to Forbes.
While the details are sparse, there is one thing we expect from this rumoured skin-care line: Inclusivity will be at the forefront. After she revolutionised foundation and concealer (thus birthing the "Fenty Effect "), we see Rihanna approaching skin-care in the same way — both by representing women of colour in her campaigns and serving them in the products offered. We'd also take a guess that Rihanna will include sheet masks, as we learned she is a huge fan of them, according to her makeup artist Priscilla Ono.
And really, what better way to prep for your Fenty Beauty makeup products than with smooth skin after a Fenty Skin face mask? We're on to you, Ri.
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Do you know why my microbladed eyebrows have changed colour? I noticed after a few months that they have a bit of a purple tinge to them. I had a look on Twitter and saw other people complaining of the same thing, or a more green tinge, but no one really knew what was going on. How can I restore them to their former glory?
Imogen, 31
Microblading has exploded in popularity at an exponential rate. In the space of a year I’ve seen it go from "Ugh, no, I would never get semi-permanent makeup," to seeing half of my beauty industry colleagues sat with numbing cream and clingfilm over their brows whenever I go to get mine threaded. When it’s done well, it means freedom from the tyranny of brow pencils and spoolies, and for those not blessed with the bushiest of brows, or whose brows have depleted over the years, it means finally getting a full, luscious brow again.
However, as with all procedures, it doesn’t always go well. I asked my personal brow queen, Suman Jalaf of Suman Brows, if she’d ever heard of microbladed brows changing colour. "I wouldn’t say it’s normal, as in it shouldn’t happen. But it does," confirmed Jalaf. "There are a few reasons why it might happen. Usually, it’s a case of cheap pigments being used or not using the pigment correctly, for example, when one pigment needs to be mixed with another shade of pigment to get the right colour for the client outcome. It might work in the short term, but mixing pigment incorrectly can lead to discolouration."
Aside from using a shoddy pigment, Jalaf noted that the 'fingerprint' of your skin can play a role. "If you’re not having a thorough consultation with the client to understand their skin tone and texture, the ink can become tinged or off-colour," added Jalaf. "Also, if a client isn’t taking good care of the area after the treatment, and following the guidelines around exposure to other chemicals and elements, that can be an issue."
Let’s say that you did everything right, and followed the aftercare instructions perfectly. Could it have been a haphazard application technique? Jalaf told me: "Sometimes, a technician might insert the pigment too deeply into the skin, where it can then disperse and turn into a 'blur' effect on the skin, especially if the skin is very oily. This can end up looking off-colour. There is always a risk with poor quality pigments too."
Without having been there with you, it’s hard to know exactly what went wrong. But for now, Jalaf says correction may be possible. "While you can attempt to just fix around what’s already there, I would absolutely recommend getting a removal of the microblading first, which I offer as a service. The amount of sessions of removal required will depend on the brow shade and how deep the pigment was inserted, but it’s the best first step." If you’re not sure if you want to have it all removed just yet, Jalaf noted that playing around with concealer and brow pencil could work as a stopgap.
Illustrated by Olivia Santner
I’m sorry you’ve found yourself in this spot, Imogen, and I’m crossing my fingers for you that yours will be one of the easier ones to remove. To anyone reading who’s considering getting their brows microbladed, heed Jalaf’s words: "With a full consultation with the right, fully qualified expert, they will be able to advise and decide on the correct shade for you with high grade pigment. Remember: research, research, research when looking for the right expert for you."
And be wary of prices that seem too good to be true. Microblading is an expensive service that often costs north of £300, so anything considerably lower may not use the highest quality pigments or technicians. Also, don’t just look at pictures on their social media of freshly done brows. Look for technicians who also post clients' selfies a few months later. When you arrive, make sure the environment is sterile. All the equipment should be single-use and in pre-sealed packets. Shop around, get recommendations from people you know and trust, and if you can’t find anything in your price range, it’s better to save and go for a tint in the meantime, rather than make what could be a very expensive mistake.
Good luck!
Daniela
Got a question for our resident beauty columnist Daniela Morosini? No problem, qualm or dilemma is too big, small or niche. Emaildeardaniela@refinery29.uk, including your name and age for a chance to have your question answered. All letters to 'Dear Daniela' become the property of Refinery29 and will be edited for length, clarity, and grammatical correctness.
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Is there anything more frustrating than scrolling through your holiday photos trying to find something even slightly worth posting, and coming up empty-handed? Gone are the days when a #hotdogsorlegs shot with a dodgy filter/border combo was enough for your entire week in Crete. In 2019, taking a great holiday picture is a minefield: how to frame a scene just so, how to get the light right at night and how to nail the all-important top-down food shot – all while trying to conceal your holiday smugness.
As a photographer, I'm no newbie to the humble holiday snap. Being abroad and outside, immersed in a different colour palette, means you always get the best light; there's something about being in a new place that just makes you look at things differently. Plus you have more time to play around with your final shot.
To make sure you come home from your holiday with photos to be proud of, I've put together a guide to taking the perfect holiday pics. Say goodbye to shiny foreheads and suncream smears on the lens, and click through for some tips on getting the greatest snaps on the 'gram this summer.
These photos were all shot on the Pixel 3, available from £739, with travel arranged by Google.
Street view
One of the nicest things on holiday has to be wandering around foreign streets, discovering little quirks. Streets are often one of the most photogenic elements of a city, with interesting plants, old cars and street corners just waiting to be photographed. When shooting against buildings, look to place yourself square on and parallel with your subject, centring it and lining up the background. This little contained orange tree is really set off by the graffiti and softly painted buildings behind.
Food is quite hard to photograph but can look good with a few key elements. You need good light for starters, so try and get a table outside or by a window. Try and resist the temptation to dig in straightaway, and shoot it from above, trying to square up with your subject as best you can (if you can bear the humility). You don't want to make it look too perfect, though; a bit of organised chaos feels more relaxed. A bright table always helps, too.
The temptation is always there to snap away at an amazing view. Make it more interesting by placing something in the foreground and, like I've done here with this wooden frame, try framing your shot through something like the opening of a tent, the back of a van, a cool window or natural frame. This will add depth and intrigue to what's already a beautiful view.
We all love a good sky shot, whether your preference is for colours fading seamlessly into one another, dramatic pink streaks or a big blue expanse with fluffy, Simpsons -esque clouds. I also find that a sky shot provides a nice breathing space between more detailed images in your feed. Try splitting the horizon in half, like in this image here, which could also be achieved from any high viewpoint. Or if the sky is looking particularly pretty on it's own, just fill the entire shot with a full frame sky.
Some of the best moments on hols are at night, but they're always so hard to capture without resorting to an unflattering flash or going for the blurry look. While phone cameras are definitely getting better, most don't have the functionality to cope with low light. The new night sight setting on the Google Pixel 3 uses artificial intelligence to help capture detailed shots effectively in the dark, without a flash. This was taken in very low light – almost dark, in fact – but you can see everything super clearly. However, for those with other smartphones like iPhones or Samsungs, grab a pal and ask them to shine their phone's torch down onto your subject, angled a little to the side. Then take your low-light pic; trying out a few different angles from both your camera and your friend's torch - it's far from a perfect hack but you may find it does the trick.
Ah, the classic sunset snap. The key to a good sunset shot is to make sure you're metering the exposure by tapping your smartphone screen on the lightest area, adjusting the brightness so that the sun is the focal point; this will avoid any bleached out areas and intensify the colours, so it shoots as good as it looks. Try adding a silhouette into the shot to make it a bit more interesting.
Abundant fruit markets, food and local crafts make for great holiday photo fodder, with repetition a key to visual success. Focus on what you want to photograph and line it up carefully, trying to fill the frame completely to give the feeling of plenty and pattern. I'd avoid taking photos of every market stall, as it can be annoying for traders. Cut down to one or two scenes instead – no one wants to fill up their photo library in one shopping trip anyway.
It's refreshing that brands are trying to de-stigmatise an issue that can emasculate men – and it makes sense, given that there's cause to believe younger men are increasingly finding it difficult to get or maintain an erection for long enough to have sex. A study of 2,000 British men last year found that half of men in their 30s and 35% of men in their 20s are "struggling in the bedroom", with stress, tiredness, anxiety and boozing too heavily cited as the predominant causes. The ubiquity of porn is also named as a possible cause.
The Instagram-ready billboards might do something to tackle the stigma surrounding ED for some men but certainly not all – a recent study of 1,000 men and 1,000 women by Numan found that less than half (42%) of men who have experienced ED took steps to fix it. Nor is the taboo lifting among the sexual partners of those with the condition. The fallout and shame arising from ED remains far worse for men themselves, of course – nearly 50% of men with ED told Numan's survey they felt self-conscious during sex, while nearly 20% avoided it altogether, and 79% were experiencing anxiety of some kind – but its impact on their romantic partners and relationships shouldn't be overlooked.
How do affected couples communicate about an issue that is so sensitive? How does it make them feel about themselves? And how does it affect their own sexual satisfaction and experience of sex? Sex and relationship experts advise "talking to him and letting him know that he has nothing to feel ashamed of" and suggesting that he seek professional help if the problem persists. But it can be difficult squaring your partner's wellbeing, self-esteem and masculine identity with your own needs, as two women in heterosexual relationships told Refinery29.
Jo, 36, a strategist and self-described serial monogamist, was in a relationship with a man with erectile dysfunction which was "cut short due to ED and how it manifested in the relationship," she says.
"The situation was twofold; he'd had health issues in the past brought on by a partying lifestyle that resulted in a mild heart issue, and he previously had an addiction to pornography, which he felt had warped his mind and changed how his body responded in intimate situations. I didn't know any of this, of course, but I sensed a disconnect when we were intimate. Like his mind went somewhere else. I found out a few months in that he regularly used Viagra to deal with it. He hadn't spoken to anyone else before and god knows where he was getting the medication.
Sex became less about my enjoyment and more about 'fixing' him.
During the next few months, sex changed... I acted more like a sex therapist than a girlfriend. It was probably the first time he'd discussed it with anyone. I wished there was someone else, like a professional, who he could speak to, to take the pressure off me. Sex became less about my enjoyment and more about 'fixing' him. I did a lot of research but didn't really know what to do in this situation and if I was being a 'good' girlfriend or not. Was I making it worse or better? I was kind and patient for sure but pushed my needs and feelings aside as a result.
The ED took over everything. If we wanted guaranteed sex then it had to be planned, so it was less spontaneous and felt fake. I think he possibly took too strong a dose or was on the wrong medication too, because I felt he changed a bit as a person sexually. As I say, it felt like a therapy session, which brought us closer together in a way but also got boring very quickly for me. I sound like a bitch even now saying it, but that's the truth.
The experience gave me a good insight into how hard it can be to be a man in 2019 and opened my eyes to how modern lifestyles, porn and mental health can really affect the physiology of a human; we all need to get to know and understand our bodies better. It taught me to be more patient and how to have tough conversations. Moreover, it taught me to care about my own feelings more, when to set boundaries and when to cut out."
Photographed by Kate Anglestein
Melissa (not her real name), 29, who works in recruitment, saw a man for several months from September last year, and it soon became clear that his religious beliefs were hampering his ability to have sex.
"I was really excited about him as we clicked on so many levels. Before we'd slept together, he told me he was quite religious and that he'd probably want to explore it more when he got older and settled down. I'm not religious, but I didn't think too much of it. On another occasion, he started talking about certain foreplay things he liked to do and asked if I was game – I was. Back at mine we started getting into it and he focused his attention on me during foreplay. He didn’t let me pay much attention to him. He had an erection at the time. However, when it came to having intercourse he lost it, proceeded to hug me and said that what we had just done was so amazing, etc. The foreplay was good and I'd been hoping we'd go the whole way since the dirty talk at dinner. I brushed it off.
I felt deflated that he couldn’t go the whole way. It made me think I was the problem.
We met up again and the same thing happened – he couldn’t get hard to have sex. We tried and it got a little hard but he lost it immediately. I could see that he was frustrated, but I could also sense he knew what was going on. I told him he could feel comfortable speaking to me about it, as we'd already had several deep conversations. Eventually, he told me his ex-girlfriend of five years was very religious and only wanted to have sex once she was married. He'd had a few sexual partners before her and was willing to wait. In the last year of his relationship they began to experiment with foreplay and when they eventually had sex, at his insistence, it didn’t feel right and they ended up splitting up. Essentially, he could only get hard off his kinky foreplay fantasy and had gone so long without intercourse that when it came to it, he had a mental and physical block.
We got on well but the lack of sex and his unwillingness to address it meant we didn't see much of each other after that. I was willing to try and help out, be understanding and patient but he kept me at a distance and ultimately didn't want to talk to me about it. Since he'd been so forward about what he wanted in bed I felt deflated that he couldn’t go the whole way. It made me think I was the problem. I now realise this wasn't the case, but if your partner has ED and doesn’t admit it, doesn’t talk about it and distances themselves, it doesn't make you feel good. Men rarely talk about it and women are often embarrassed to talk about it with their friends to avoid embarrassing their partner, so seek your own advice and if your partner is hesitant, broach the subject yourself. Give them resources or solutions and let them know it's a common problem. Help them to find out what really might be causing it."
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"I had struggled with reconciling my love for fashion, beautifully made and cut clothes, and sartorial experimentation with the love for street wear, anti-fashion youth movements and trash culture in general," writes Sofia Prantera, designer and cofounder of cult label Aries, in her brand manifesto, "so we decided that Aries should encompass all these elements."
Alongside Fergus Purcell, the creator of the iconic Palace triangle logo, with whom she first worked on pioneering '90s brand Silas, Sofia has created the ultimate hybrid, where fashion meets streetwear, luxury meets underground. At brands like Off-White, streetwear manifests as athleisure and can feel reserved for Gen Z, but Aries' amalgamation – despite its skatepark roots – appeals as much to Supremacists and hypebeasts as it does your Matches Fashion customer. The brand's laconic tees can be worn with a bucket hat, oversized denim and kicks, its silk shirts teamed with a Stella McCartney suit. Aries defies definition.
The London-based, Italian-crafted label was established as a womenswear brand in 2012, and in a male-dominated streetwear landscape, changed the narrative by making oversized long-sleeved tees and irreverent and referential graphics a new offering for women (though a reflection of what Sofia had been wearing all along). Demand grew and Aries expanded to include men’s sizes, so it’s now genderless or unisex or whatever you want to call a label that doesn’t care who you are, it just wants to dress you. "I have always designed and dressed in some sort of unisex way, but when we started Aries, it did seem outdated to be making different T-shirts for men and women," Sofia tells Refinery29. "But it was an instinct, not a real plan."
As well as breaking down the confines of gender within streetwear, you could argue that Sofia and Fergus predicted fashion’s new informality, long before Virgil Abloh’s neon and logo-driven label was crowned 2018’s Hottest Brand. Of course, hindsight is a beautiful thing. "I would love to say that I saw the future and had some kind of vision that tees and jeans was the way forward but, again, I didn't articulate it that way at the time," says Sofia. Instinct is what seems to drive Aries – an intuition of what’s relevant, what’s cool, what’s going to capture the zeitgeist while simultaneously recalling tenets of the past.
Most recently, that intuition has inspired a collaboration with the artist Jeremy Deller, which centres around the mysteries of Stonehenge. As always, Aries' signature pithy humour is there, with T-shirts emblazoned with winky smiley faces (the eyes represented by the prehistoric standing stones) and the phrases 'Make Archeology Sexy Again' and 'Stonehenge: Built by Immigrants'. The moody campaign was shot by legendary photographer David Sims and an accompanying exhibition, Wiltshire Before Christ, was hosted at The Store X on London's Strand.
To celebrate Aries' SS19 collection, all pastel tie-dye tees meets electric animal print bowling shirts meets soft crepe tailoring, we asked Sofia about her obsession with subcultures, how underground movements can thrive in the digital age, and the films, podcasts and spaces inspiring her right now.
Hi Sofia! What first drew you to London?
My mother is English, and we used to come here on holiday, and both my sister and I moved here to study art at a young age. I think my mother subconsciously pushed us to leave Italy and make something of ourselves. She used to bring back fashion and culture magazines like i-D and The Face plus some art college prospectuses. I wanted to do maths at uni but had this fascination with club culture and fashion that eventually took over.
Tell me about your time at Central Saint Martins.
It was really fun, though I am not sure we were taught much. All the other students were so interesting and creative – I had no idea what I was doing and was a pretty average student :-( I had zero creativity. In Italian schools you don't do any art at all. I remember looking at other people's work and thinking, How did they come out with that idea? I had zero ideas.
I read a tutor there told you that streetwear wasn't fashion – what was your response?
It was me and two other boys in my class that had done a streetwear project and we just laughed, you know, in that arrogant way that young people have when they think they – and often do – know best.
After graduation you were working at Rough Trade / Slam City Skates with Russell Waterman, with whom you went on to found Silas. What was your mission with the label?
After a while of going into work without any specific responsibilities (although I did fold a lot of T-shirts), Russell, who was employed but sort of ran the company, suggested we did our own in-house label, so we started a new brand called Holmes. We eventually got frustrated of not being able to run it as we felt was right and decided to leave and start a new brand. Silas Holmes was the name of the fictitious character in charge of designing Holmes, but we left the name Holmes behind and started Silas.
Did you predict how successful Aries would be when you began?
No. No one really understood it, but it was my fault really, as I can be very introverted, especially about my work; I find it difficult to talk about it. I would love to say that I saw the future and had some kind of vision that tees and jeans was the way forward, but I didn't articulate it that way at the time – I just did what I do and left it there for other people to sell and understand. I had been out of work for a few years and I wasn't very confident about my vision. It is easy now to look back and say I was right all along, but I didn't know that then.
Your work is so tied up with counterculture and subcultures. Why do you think you're so drawn to them?
I think it’s partly my education, as my parents are quite nerdy. My dad collects political comics like Métal Hurlant, Il Mago; there isn't a proper British equivalent but they’re actually quite highbrow. The content mixes adult comics and political writings and they were part of the counterculture movements of the '70s and '80s, mainly in France and Italy. We were brought up reading them. It is also generational, I think: a lot of people my age were inspired to take different career paths by following and belonging to subcultures.
Italy has this legendary fashion scene – do you think your nationality has shaped your work?
Growing up in a mixed-culture family it is difficult to know which part influenced what, and it is possibly the mix that was the most influential in what I chose to do in my career. I think the nature of being dual nationality creates this tension in your output. It is like you are constantly trying to find a balance.
Streetwear has typically been a male-dominated area. Do you think that's changed over time?
Possibly. I think there might be a social element to why subcultures are predominantly male-dominated; it could be because, historically, women would have had children and looked after families. As the position of women in society changes, we will see more change. Often, though, subcultures – especially streetwear – are led by obsessions, and I think on the whole women tend to have less obsessive behaviour. This might be both cultural and genetic, so I’m not sure.
Did you ever struggle being the only woman in the room?
No I didn't, as I have always enjoyed being different. But it is quite possible that had I been male, I would have found success earlier in my life.
How do you feel subcultures have evolved or changed in the era of social media?
I think the real subcultures are the ones you don't see on social media. Our classic notion of a slow-building underground movement and its subsequent, unavoidable commercial exploitation and promotion by the mainstream has ceased to exist because of the power of social media; everything burns too fast.
But they do still exist – not as fashion but as counterculture. Interestingly, I don't think it's generational, and to survive in its original form it has to insulate itself against exploitation by being truly underground and therefore, out of necessity, be unattractive to potential mainstream audiences. So maybe this makes it more of an underground than ever before.
Finally, what does rebellion mean to you?
Going your own way.
Five overlooked cultural highlights inspiring Sofia right now...
'80s magazine Frigidaire
"It is an Italian underground magazine which was very formative for me growing up. It dealt with information, counterculture, taboos, comics. It was very left-field and a very important part of my development."
Bruno Bozzetto's VIP My Brother Superman
"Just an amazing and very overlooked Italian animation film that deals with consumer culture. Extremely beautiful and ahead of its time."
Scorpio Rising by Kenneth Anger
"Kenneth Anger has also always been very ahead of his time. Scorpio Rising deals with themes of extreme masculinity and fetishises clothing and dressing up. It's a must-view for anyone interested in fashion, subculture and their history."
The Bomarzo Park, outside Rome
"A beautiful and forgotten monster park in the outskirts of Rome. Mysterious, bizarre and completely unique."
Under the Skin with Russell Brand
"Russell Brand’s political podcast, where he interviews intellectuals and thinkers like Douglas Rushkoff, Yanis Varoufakis, Adam Curtis, Brad Evans and Henry Giroux to name a few. They are very simple yet deep, inspiring and funny."
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I first heard about the cult lesbian festival Dinah Shore the same way that most lesbians do, from what often feels like our one cultural reference point, the TV show The L Word. In the episode that features the festival, the show’s staple group of LA power lesbians embark on a roadtrip to Palm Springs, where they are confronted by a pumping all-women Spring Break pool party. A few of the characters hook up with strangers they meet (like Sex and The City, The L Word features several sexual encounters per episode), while the rest discover a weekend of inclusivity, fun and sun. The L Word painted Dinah as a sapphic playground, a weekend of dyketastic debauchery. Watching, I knew that one day I would have to go. When the opportunity finally came this year, I decided I would assemble a group and we would take on the festival together. A pack of lesbians on the prowl.
As well as wanting to come as close to being a character in The L Word as possible, the main reason I have always wanted to attend Dinah is the desire to know how it feels to be surrounded by so many other bisexual, lesbian and queer women. Often, as LGBTQ+ people, we endure periods of isolation; there were moments in my earlier life where I felt like I was the only person in the world who was the way I was... and I was one of the lucky ones, who eventually found a home in London, a city with queer female club nights and specialist lesbian dating apps. For some of the people visiting Dinah from across America and beyond, this would not be the case. I wanted to meet these people, and hear what the event gave them.
Photographed by Alix SpencePhotographed by Alix Spence
The festival itself has been running for 28 years, started in 1991 by a lesbian called Mariah Hanson at the Palm Springs Modern Art Museum, where lesbians reportedly drank martinis and mingled among millions of dollars worth of art. Chic. Gradually, it grew in size; later highlights included 2006, when The Pussycat Dolls played, 2009 when Lady Gaga made an appearance, and 2010 when Kesha performed. Today, it bills itself as a five-day weekend getaway for lesbians and queer girls, and the biggest event of its type in the world. Thousands of women attend, and there are almost a dozen main events, with other splinter or rival parties like Krave Spring Break, which focuses on including queer women of colour.
The official Dinah currently begins on a Wednesday, with a meet and greet pre-party, hotting up on the Thursday with an opening party at a bar in downtown Springs, before organisers Club Skirt begin their notorious three-day pool party schedule on Friday at the Hilton Palm Springs, where much of the festival takes place. Many Dinah partygoers choose to stay here, in the thick of the action, but instead I chose an Airbnb Plus nearby in Palm Springs, since I’ve always wanted to stay in one of the city's famous modernist homes, but also so that I could escape and have a nap when it all got a bit too much.
I decided to begin my Dinah journey on the Friday evening, at the Dinah Shore standup comedy night where the brilliant Fortune Feimster took to the stage with lines like: "I needed someone to come out for me… sit me down and be like, Fortune, YOU GAY." From here, we moved over to the infamous (again, mostly because of The L Word) black and white party, which takes place in the sweeping carpeted halls of the Palm Springs Convention Centre. With a red carpet, big white wall drapes and soft purple lighting, it was – rather touchingly – like the lesbian prom I’m almost certain none of us ever had. Everyone seemed so comfortable making out with one another in a way that I had never witnessed among gay women. At one point, someone came on stage and started rapping about smoking "girl blunts" while dancers in thongs whipped their hair, shook their asses and collected dollar bills... Best prom ever.
Photographed by Alix Spence
On Saturday, my girlfriend, my friends and I finally decided to descend on the pool party. What should we bring, we debated? We chose all the lesbian essentials: me, an open shirt that made me look like a dad at a BBQ; my friend, a Patagonia rucksack full of practical items like sun cream; the rest, uniforms of tight white vests. As we approached the Hilton, the streets outside were lined with Subarus and pickup trucks, so I knew we were in the right place. Inside was a lesbian Garden of Eden, if the Garden of Eden was heavily branded by sponsors, full of women in snapback caps and served delicious canned wine.
At first, I was overwhelmed by the sheer scale of it – there must have been around a thousand women there, some making out in the pool, others chilling on their hotel room balconies. Meanwhile, "My Neck, My Back" blasted from the speakers as gay women of all ages grinded one another, twerked and slutdropped with abandon.
Photographed by Alix SpencePhotographed by Alix Spence
Once we became acclimatised, we started to relax, dance, and talk to other women. Charlotte, 27, from New York told me that as a "baby dyke" (lexicon for someone who is newly gay or exploring their sexuality), she had never felt hotter than at Dinah. "This is a pretty new scene for me but I feel completely welcome and I’m celebrating a part of myself that I used to hide." Two glamorous women from Orange County told me they were a new couple, there for a romantic weekend away together. An older woman told me that she’d rather we didn’t take her photo because she wasn’t out at home. Another woman was there on her hen do.
Isabella, 25, from Portland, said: "I came to Dinah as a bi woman for a fun queer girls weekend with my friends. I feel more comfortable with my body than I ever could have anticipated, as a fat person I’m loving the body diversity – I’m seeing a lot of chunky butts and stretch marks, which are all beautiful!" Her feelings about the event's diversity were echoed when founder Hanson got on stage and announced that at Dinah everyone was welcome (I later checked with the event's PR what this meant exactly – she confirmed that it meant people of all races and gender identities).
Photographed by Alix SpencePhotographed by Alix Spence
After the pool party (and a nap) we swapped out of our swimwear and headed back to the Convention Centre for the Saturday night Hollywood Party. Suddenly the red carpet made a lot more sense, as US influencers and vloggers like Mads Paige and Ambers Closet had their pictures taken and talked to their fans. A pop star called Daya played, women slow danced with one another, and I got so drunk that I passed out in my friend's boobs. My girlfriend (who didn’t seem to mind this) told me in the cab on the way home what the festival meant to her: "As a femme-presenting woman, it’s nice to be somewhere that people just assume you’re gay, rather than the other way around. I felt completely and openly myself."
As for me, I decided to give the Sunday a miss in favour of some of the other things you can do in Palm Springs: hike, walk around downtown, drive out to Joshua Tree National Park. But the festival taught me a lot. I learned that you will never know all the lesbian lingo. I had no idea that a "stem" is a cross between a stud and a femme. Or that I am considered to be one. I wasn’t aware who any of the singers or the influencers were, which made me realise that there’s a lot more to lesbian culture than The L Word. And I discovered that, thanks to events like Dinah Shore, we needn’t all be alone or isolated. I went there with friends and I made many more. As for Dinah 2020, we’ll see...
Update (Friday 12th April 2019): Upskirting is officially a crime in England and Wales from today. Offenders who take a photo or video under someone's clothing will receive up to two years in prison, with the most serious offenders being placed on the sex offenders register, the Ministry of Justice announced. Campaigner Gina Martin said she was "so happy" to see the Voyeurism Act come into effect. "Finally we have a fit-for-purpose law that protects against every instance of upskirting - as we should have always had. But this is just the beginning. Please raise your voice and report if you are a victim or if you see someone become one - every report builds a picture so we can stop upskirting."
Update (Tuesday 15th January 2019): The bill to make upskirting a sexual offence has passed its final stage at the House of Lords. (All that's left now is for the bill, which will make upskirting a crime in England and Wales, to gain Royal Assent.)
"The last 18-months of campaigning have been a steep learning curve," 26-year-old Gina Martin, who was upskirted herself at a music festival 18 months ago and led the campaign against it, said today. "To the outsider, the ordinary person, law and politics are complex and daunting. But both are penetrable if you believe in yourself and find the right support."
Update (1.30 pm. Monday 18th June 2018): The government announced today that it will be putting forward a bill to make upskirting a sexual offence, campaigner Gina Martin said on Twitter this afternoon. It follows the shock objection to the bill on Friday by a single Conservative MP, Christopher Chope, who has faced widespread condemnation, including from members of his own party, ever since.
"I said that we'd look back on Friday as the day one man tried to stand in the way of justice and didn't. But I didn't realise we'd be looking back on it so soon," Martin wrote, adding that she was "so happy [she] could cry". "The bill will go through. The Government, Ryan [Whelan] and I will finish this. Upskirting will be made a sexual offence."
BREAKING NEWS: The Gov, @ryantwhelan and I are proud to announce that they will be introducing an #UpskirtingBill as a Government Bill, to ensure the gap in the law is closed. 🙌🙌🙌
Update (3p.m. Friday 15th June 2018): The bill to make upskirting a specific crime was blocked when Conservative MP Sir Christopher Chope objected to it. It was expected to pass after the government earlier announced its support. It's not over yet, though... The next reading will be on 6th July.
My official statement on Sir Christopher Chope blocking our bill to make upskirting a sexual offence. pic.twitter.com/xWxu7rZaYb
Update (10a.m. Friday 15th June 2018): Upskirting is set to become a criminal offence punishable by two years in jail following a campaign led by 26-year-old Gina Martin. The Ministry of Justice said the government would support the private member's bill introduced by the Lib Dem MP Wera Hobhouse, who threw her weight behind the campaign.
"From the beginning of the campaign, so many people told me it would be impossible to get the government to back this campaign. But today, I can proudly say they have," Martin told Refinery29 UK on Friday. "I sat with justice minister Lucy Frazier yesterday with my lawyer Ryan Whelan and we spoke about my campaign and the detail of the bill.
"It was clear that not only is Lucy supportive, but that she cares and is right behind my campaign. It’s so brilliant to know that not only does she really, truly care about this becoming a specific offence, but that she is impressed by our campaign and thinks the legislation we’ve put forward is the right solution. With Victoria Atkin MP passionately on board too, and so many other MPs from all parties truly believing in and standing behind our bill, the government is well and truly behind us.”
This story was originally published on Thursday 14th June.
It wasn't even a year ago that a man took an upskirt photo of Gina Martin during a gig in London's Hyde Park, but having taken on the issue and made national headlines with her campaign to change the law, the 26-year-old is close to making her mark on UK legislation.
Martin, who has held down her job as a writer throughout the gruelling campaign, has been working towards making upskirting – the act of taking an upskirt photo of someone without their consent – a sexual offence in England and Wales. Upskirting can currently be prosecuted, but only under 'voyeurism' if you are in a private place, or with a public nuisance order called 'outraging public decency' if you are in public. Martin and her 'partner in justice', lawyer Ryan Whelan, argue this is inappropriate as it fails to acknowledge upskirting as a crime with a victim and, crucially, it means perpetrators aren't recognised as sexual offenders.
Excitingly, Martin and Whelan have also provided input on a bill that looks likely to become law. The Voyeurism (Offences) Bill 2017-19, which will make upskirting a specific sexual offence, was tabled by Lib Dem MP Wera Hobhouse and is due a second reading in the House of Commons on Friday 15th June. If it gets through parliament it could see perpetrators of upskirting be fined or receive a jail sentence of up to two years.
It feels amazing being able to hold a physical copy of the draft bill, Martin told Refinery29 UK in parliament yesterday, ahead of its second reading. "This has been almost a year coming so I'm really happy about it," she said, adding that it's been worth the agony of having to recall her traumatic experience time and again throughout the campaign.
"It's been quite hard to continually retell it and not be able to let it go, but this will be closure when we change the law so it will have been totally worth having to tell it a thousand times a day."
For a young woman with no previous campaigning experience or legal expertise, leading a movement of this size has been a learning curve, she said. "The most valuable thing I've learned is that if you want to change something, you can not like the system but you have to play within the system and do things the right way. You have to know exactly what you're talking about, ask for help and get the right people in with you. I couldn't have done it on my own, but we're not quite there yet!"
Wera Hobhouse MP and Gina Martin.
She's also learned a lot about herself along the way. "I've realised I'm more robust than I thought I was and that if you just keep going and don't give up you can actually change stuff. I thought I'd find it too hard but I just didn't stop and I'm really proud of myself for that."
As well as changing the law, of course, Martin hopes to encourage more people to come forward regardless of what happens to them or how 'everyday' the assault is. "More importantly, I also want to have a conversation about how we treat women's bodies in public and how we normalise this type of behaviour."
Whelan believes the law change would "without question" make it easier to prosecute people who upskirt. "The word 'upskirting' would exist in law as a specific offence, police officers in England and Wales would know about it, charging officers would know about it, the Crown Prosecution Service would use it, and so women will be safer," he told Refinery29 UK. "They will be protected properly and appropriately and offenders dealt with in a way that's suitable."
Laila Woozeer, 27, who was upskirted on a bus when she was 20 and wrote about her experience for Refinery29 UK, said it's been amazing watching the campaign unfold. "It's blown up so much and it just goes to show that upskirting is a universal issue that a lot of women can relate to. I couldn't believe it wasn't a sexual offence already."
She said awareness of the issue has grown among her male friends, while her female friends have felt more comfortable to speak out. "They told me it had happened to them but they hadn't realised there was a term for it, they just thought it was a weird experience they'd had. Even just being able to name something makes it easier to deal with it."
Woozeer believes the law change will make women more likely to come forward. "Previously they may not have seen a point in coming forward and sharing their story, and we already know how women who report any kind of assault get treated – not well. But if you know there might be some action as a result of you coming forward you'll be much more likely to do so.
"Women are realising how bad they've had it for so long and trying to take things back, and the upskirting campaign will have inspired so many people to stand up for their rights and realise that things aren't okay as they stand, and that we shouldn't brush things under the carpet as 'just part of being a woman'."
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